22 Weeks

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Processed with VSCOcam with b1 preset {22+3 Weeks • Rooted} I've grown roots, not physical roots of course, but a rootedness to the earth, to myself, and to my unborn child. It happened unknowingly during my last pregnancy I'm sure, but I was too busy preparing in every way imaginable that I clearly must have missed it. Early pregnancy for me is like a freshly potted plant, roots frayed and wild, reaching out for soil that is unsteady and loose, instead I reach for the closeness of others, mostly my husband. He could not come home from work soon enough, I followed him around like a lost puppy needing attention. Any room he was in I had to be, I'm sure it drove him nuts though I'll never know it, because he was there with arms wide open.

Then just like that, my roots finally take hold, grounding me, and I crave space and solitude. Every step I take leaves behind a tangible warmth, proof of my existence. I find comfort in the quiet of being alone, most evenings spent sitting on the porch as the last rays of light flee, peacefully greeting the night, while I thankfully reminisce about the day, and contemplate the future. All the while joyfully aware of the tiny being resting just beneath my skin. For me, a person who has searched all their life for this indescribable feeling, on top of mountains, down rivers, off the beaten path, and to finally find 'it' within myself, is the greatest blessing I could have ever hoped for.